I remember when I first started playing the drums back in 1976. I was just ten years old, and the thought of being an awesome drummer in a band just consumed me.

I remember dreaming about playing drums in front of hundreds, or even thousands of people someday. But, I really never considered how difficult it would be to finally get to that point.

Now, after thirty years of drumming, and playing with dozens of different musicians with various personalities, I can clearly see why most drummers and other musicians cannot play together for very long.

The three biggest reasons are… personality conflicts, ego, and just life in general.

Some people may think personality conflicts occur all because of ego. Even though sometimes that is true, personality conflicts can result from simply just not liking another person for whatever reasons.

As far as ego is concerned, there is nothing wrong with a good healthy ego. It’s when that ego gets distorted and someone begins to think he or she is something they’re really not. That is when it gets ugly.

I remember playing drums in a band back in 1985. The lead guitarist was so arrogant no one could hardly stand him. He was definitely a great guitarist, the only problem was, he knew it… if you know what I mean.

There is simply one way to get along with someone with a totally distorted view of themselves, and that is to let them continue to think the way they want to think.

A person with an overinflated ego is so sickening that most people cannot bear it for long. And one person with an ego problem usually cannot work with another person with an ego problem because then it becomes a battle of the wills. That’s one of the biggest reasons bands break up.

Anything with more than one head is a freak and will not function properly unless everyone involved willingly agrees on any particular topic.

Another reason why drummers and other musicians cannot play together for very long is because of the things “life” throws in the way.

People get married, people change jobs and move away, people have babies, people get sick, and the list is endless.

The only thing that controls your future as a drummer is you. Will you decide to have a likable personality? Will you keep your ego in check? Will you keep a good attitude and stay focused when “life” throws it’s fiery darts at you? It’s all up to you.